just another eye update...

oy vey...another eye doctor appointment. but at least the news at each one is getting better and the concern for her vision drops a little. today we saw dr. g who was the first doctor to realize that her eyelids were flipping and suggested the pressure patch which ultimately saved annabel from surgery. its funny at children's hospital because when we make a follow up appointment we make it with the office and not with a particular doctor. for that reason we have seen five different eye doctors in our eight visits. dr. c was our favorite probably because she was a resident that we actually saw every day for five straight days. bottom line though, their system may be wack but it saved our baby's eye so i guess it works. as for today's visit, the scratch is not really a concern anymore but there is still a little bit of "haziness." the steroid drops that she's on should be clearing that up but it takes a while. dr. g said that we want it to clear up because if it stays too long and makes it harder for her to see out of her left eye, then she will start "favoring" her right. then we would end up having to patch her right eye to force her to use her left and then we're right back to having a robocop baby with a patch. today's visit was good but we've still got a follow up appointment (or ten) before they tell us we're in the clear. it could be worse though. we count our blessings daily and thank god for the baby that he gave us. because it could be worse...



this photo here was taken on saturday, september 19 at our second eye doctor appointment when dr. g and dr. c noticed the entropion for the first time. i love the photo because it truly shows a mother's love for her baby...

please pray for luke...

through our experience with annabel, cheryl and i have truly felt and experienced the power of prayer. another family that we know is dealing with some extreme challenges with their brand new baby. please pray for kathryn, scott and their new son, luke...

http://teamwhitaker.blogspot.com/

world's longest basketball shot

nothing to do with our baby but pretty stinking awesome!



or click here to view on youtube

so how about that "birth plan"...

following is a series of messages between cheryl and cindy (her sister who is due with her first baby on october 12) about our "birth plan". just thought it was funny enough to share...

cindy: umm clearly if you had one it didn't go as planned but....did you have a birth plan made up? If you did can you send it to me- I want to make sure I didn't forget anything!

cheryl: i attached the birth plan i came up with along with the list i made of what to pack for the hospital. i can't really attest to how good either list is since i did not really use either of them! one of the days we were still in the hospital andrew & i went over our birth plan. it was funny to read through it after everything we went through. most of it is the exact opposite of what happened. however, i did successfully avoid an episiotomy - i have a 6 inch abdominal incision/scar to show for it; more than 75% of my labor was spent at home, walking around and unattached to machines; and i made it through my entire labor without pain medicine! it's all about looking at the positives right?!

as far as what to pack... for yourself you don't really need much. i don't know about your hospital, but ours provided me with everything i needed and i stayed in the hospital gown all 5 days i was there. the only thing i really needed was an outfit to go home in & toiletries. we brought some "things to do" (cards, books...) for after i "got my epidural" and then after the baby was born, but we didn't use any of it. obviously the 30 minutes we were at the hospital before my c-section wasn't really the time for a quick game of go-fish and afterward things were so crazy & stressful the only non-baby thing we did was check our email. not sure what it would be like after a "normal" birth to a "normal" baby. :)

on another note. something i have experienced and apparently 99% of all women experience: breastfeeding is anything but natural. yes the baby has some sort of natural instinct to root & suck, but that is as far as it goes. i have been having a lot of trouble (mostly stemming from the decision in the hospital to nurse a little and supplement with formula and then pump - because she wasn't getting enough from me) and have been talking to all of my friends with kids and they have all had a lot of trouble too. i agree that breastmilk is the best thing and all the books are right about how great it is - but none of the books tell you how impossible it is at first. i just thought i would give you some warning. :)

let me know if you have any other questions. i know i didn't have a typical birth, but if there is anything i can help you with let me know. i am very experienced in taking a newborn to the doctors if you have any questions about that! :)

love you!
cher

mommy, what's she doing?

here's a video of annabel holding her head up all by herself. she is so precious...



or click here to view on youtube

so fresh and so clean clean...

today was bath day for annabel...and boy was she stinky! ha. not really. she kind of smelled like a baby. not that we have a whole lot of experience with that and know what a baby really smells like but i guess she smelled like what i would expect a baby to smell like (those are the kind of sentences you can come to expect until we get some more sleep...). the funniest part was probably her hair. as you can tell from the photos and videos she was certainly blessed with a full head of dark brown hair. and now its soft :) i guess that's what johnson & johnson baby shampoo is supposed to do. its nice. so you're probably wondering how our sweet, quiet, sleepy angel liked her first bath. ummm...errr...she did not. it was pretty amazing to experience what she can do with those lungs that she's got when she wants the world to know that she's not happy. we've got some video as proof. for now though you will just have to imagine our little angelic annabel screaming bloody murder as we gently bathed and massaged her tiny body. but she is squeaky clean now. and it was kind of fun. all in all i would call it a success. :)

is she fixed already?

on the seventh day, we rested...and on the eighth we went back to the doctor. :) but seriously though, today we took annabel back to the eye doctor after our day off to check out how the healing was going and get our next set of instructions. it seems like so long ago that we were pacing the halls and worrying about whether this mystery eye problem would make our baby blind in her left eye. well, today we got the closest that we have yet to a clean bill of eye health (and the heavens rejoice along with us...:)). the scratch on her cornea is virtually gone and she has just a teensey bit of swelling and haziness associated with the recovery from the trauma her poor little eye had to endure for two long weeks. and the eyelid has not flipped in since monday. to the layman, her eyes look pretty much identical for the first time ever. and all without surgery! we're not 100 percent healed yet though so we will continue to monitor her eye closely and have a follow up appointment for next wednesday. but we are close. that was doctor appointment numero uno.

doctor appointment numero dos was pretty good too. this was our follow up weight check at the pediatrician. dr. g was out so we got to see one of the other docs in the practice. its a neat system that they all work so closely together and there are no turf battles (at least that we know of yet). dr. c was great and it was nice to get a slightly different perspective. oh right - what did she weigh? she gained two whole ounces! that would have seemed like nothing to me just a few weeks ago but it was two pretty huge ounces. first of all that gets us back up to her birthweight of 7 lb 4 oz (which is a pretty big deal for babies). secondly we went two visits with no gain and it was really stressing everyone out (like the whole eye surgery and cheryl's raging infection wasnt enough...) so this was a big deal that she has gained weight. we still have some kinks to work out in the whole feeding thing but this kind of gives us some flexibility to try new systems and not be totally controlled by the doctor and her oh-so-mighty scale (but we still think that dr. g is great so we value all of her advice...).

all in all, this is a pretty big day for the robison clan. we had two good doctor appointments, i offically went back to work (even if just for a half day), cheryl survived alone with the baby (not really alone because grandma is still here but psychologically "alone" for the day), and we all got a good nap. we knew that this would be tough when we started but had no idea what "tough" really meant. the past 16 days have been some of the hardest for cheryl and me mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. its nice to see a little light at the end of the tunnel. :)

it won't be like this for long...

"it won’t be like this for long
one day soon we'll look back laughin’
at the week we brought her home
this phase is gonna fly by
so baby just hold on
‘cause it won't be like this for long..."



or click here to view on youtube

check out them feets...

bet you can't guess whose are whose... :)

let's get normal...

today was a pretty good day. we started out with a trip to the eye doctor (like each of the past 6 mornings) to check and see how the scratch was healing and how her eyelids were holding up. both were good. the scratch is still there but is much much smaller and should be totally gone in the next few days. in fact the doctor prescribed a new medicine to help prevent scarring - this means that they feel good enough about it healing that they are looking past the point of it being scratched to make sure it doesnt scar. that was pretty encouraging. and the eyelids have not flipped in two days and every day we further and further from the idea of surgery and closer to normal. yay! and get this - we don't have to take her in tomorrow! whoa! we get a day off! they want to see her again on friday to check her progress but a day off is a day off! the first day we took her in and ended up sitting in the crowded waiting room for about an hour. toward the end we asked if there was somewhere else we could wait seeing as how we have a 9-day-old baby with a nonexistent immune system. every day since then the nurse has recognized us and just sent us to the back (where it is much less crowded) when we get there. they are pretty nice.

in other news, cheryl's infection is close to gone. she went and saw her doctor today who said that things were looking good. now the trick will be to keep those ducts unclogged. lots of water, lots of rest and lots of baby feeding should be the answer. that was pretty miserable for cher so hopefully she won't have to worry about it anymore.

things have been so hectic the past few days that we realized about dinnertime that today she is two weeks old. whoa! its amazing how fast time flies. everyone tells us to try to soak in these times because they will be gone before we know it. as stressful, scary, exhausting and frustrating as the past fourteen days have been, we want to remember them forever. and we know we won't. that makes us sad. the tiny noises she makes. the kisses on the forehead. the way she kicks her feet when we change her diaper. her beautiful, beautiful baby eyes [pause]...all of these things are so special right now and i just hope and pray we can hold on to these memories for a long, long time.

day thirteen update: after the doctors...

we got through our appointments today and have some updates. we met with the oculoplastic surgeon today and they want to wait to decide if little annabel needs surgery. thats a good thing! let me explain more though. there are two things going on with her eye. the primary problem is that she has a scratch on her cornea. scratches like this normally heal on their own within a few days unless something else continues to irritate them. if they do not heal then they can scar which would most likely affect her vision and could cause major problems down the road (like not being able to see out of her left eye...). then there is the second thing. annabel has what is called entropion. this is when the eyelid flips inward and the eyelashes irritate and scratch the eyeball. entropion can happen mechanically (meaning caused by swelling or squeezing your eyes too tight) or can be congenital (meaning the eyelid is "malformed"). the past two days she has had a pressure patch on to keep the eyelids out. today at the appointment the lashes were out and have stayed out since we left. the surgeons feel this is a good sign that it was caused by the swelling of her eye caused by conjunctivitis she got at birth. there is no need to operate if this is the case so we definitely hope they are right. assuming the entropian stops and her lashes stop irritating her eyeball, the scratch on the cornea should heal up within a few days. then she will be fixed! wow! you probably never thought that you would know so much about eyelids...

the second appointment was to meet her pediatrician. she has been eating very well the past few days but is just maintaining her weight instead of putting more on. the doctor is hopeful that this due to her hypermetabolic state (all these medical terms...) caused by the stress and infection in her eye. and that she just needs more food. as i explained we are working on fixing her eye so now we just need to give her more food. the doctor gave us some good recommendations so hopefully we'll get that worked out soon. she has another weigh-in this friday.

cheryl is doing better as well. the fever from the mastitis has gone down and the pain comes and goes. she is still on her meds so we hope that the infection and the clog will be gone and gone very soon.

so there you have it, there it is. cheryl and i were comparing her time during pregnancy with life after delivery this afternoon. both have been textbook experiences - the difference is that beginning september 9 we definitely starting working out of the part of the textbook that we skipped over and thought we would never have to read...

ps - you will never know how special the prayers, messages, notes of encouragement, free meals and positive thoughts have been. thank you...

pps - you can tell by the photo that her umbilical cord fell off. we have officially upgraded to a cordless model... :)

love, a & c & a

why oh eye...

We are in need of more prayers please. Annabel's eye is not getting better (she has a scratch on her cornea which is not healing because her eyelid keeps flipping inward and her eyelashes are actually scratching her eye). The doctors at Children's Hospital aren't really sure what initially caused the flipping but nothing seems to keep it from doing it so now they are talking surgery. Surgery on a 12 day old....

Please pray for Annabel and her surgery, her doctors, and me and Andrew. It is so hard to watch her go through all of this. We meet with the surgeons tomorrow to discuss everything, I guess we will find out then when they want to do it, I imagine it would be very soon. My poor little angel has had at least one doctors appointment everyday since last Tuesday (two days after we brought her home from the hospital). She doesn't seem to mind all the poking and prodding.... I can't imagine what a happy baby she would be if she wasn't going through all of this.

On top of all this I have been dealing with mastitis (infection caused by a clogged milk duct) and have to go to my doctor on Wednesday. Last night my fever hit a high of 104.4 degrees. Oy. We also have an appointment with the pediatrician tomorrow to check her weight again since she didn't gain anything between her last two appointments. I have not been breastfeeding over the last two days because of my fever (I don't think I could have handled trying to nurse a baby that just falls asleep at the breast). I have been pumping and then bottle feed her the milk, so I imagine her weight is up now. Hopefully I will be able to get back to breastfeeding soon and that will go better.

Anyways - we can use lots of prayers.
Thank you so much.

september 18 messages from annabel

better late than never...

precious and fleeting moments...

so today we left the house at 1030am for annabel's follow-up appointment with her pediatrician, dr. g and we returned at 430pm after a trip to nationwide children's hospital and a visit with dr. l, an opthamologist. annabel weighed in at 7 lb 2 oz which is the same as she weighed at her appointment this past tuesday. that is not bad but it would have been better if she had gained some weight. (i don't think that she'll have the same wishes 16 years from now...) at the end of the appointment though, dr. g checked her eye again and encouraged us to meet with an eye doctor to get it looked at since it was still dark and producing some "gunk" (thats the technical term...). after a quick call from dr. g, we were on our way to the hospital to meet with dr. l. two hours of eye drops, bright lights, and scary tiny metal eyelid holder thingies (another technical term) later, we left with a diagnosis of a scratched cornea, prescription for drugs and yet another scheduled follow up appointment. oy vey. we definitely recommend having a non-NICU baby if you can figure that out.

we know that figuring this stuff out early is better so we can get things fixed, but long days like this with a 9-day old baby and severe sleep deprivation is certainly not either of our idea of a fun time. we are hopeful that annabel's eye problems will go away and her eating issues will quickly become a thing of the past. one of our friends told us the other day though that the nurse's comments in the hospital of "this too shall pass" (sept 11 post) will very soon sound more like a warning rather than a blessing. "it truly does go by fast, so pray not only for strength and rest, but pray that you might truly enjoy these moments for what they are: precious and fleeting moments at the beginning of a wonderful new life." (thanks amanda...)

and as you can see from the photos, she is still just as cute as ever...

tummy time with annabel

this video was shot when annabel was just six days old but she's already got some power behind those arms and legs.


or click here to view on youtube

updates to the blog?

this is us not updating the blog today... :)


don't worry. we've got lots of photos and videos to come...

is there a story behind the name?

so you may be wondering how we came to name our new little nugget annabel helen. let me tell you.

cheryl and i went through many names before we settled on this one. first there was emma and james. then came isabel and luke. we got a few books and all of a sudden we had lists. then at our week 20 ultrasound we found out she was a girl (see video on our april 29 post) which kind of cut our list in half. it was by week 26 on our baby shower trip to texas that we really had it narrowed down to our short list - annabel, isabel, molly and olivia (cheryl claims that olivia was not still on the list at that point but its one of my favorites so i still claim it was always an option). it was then that we realized that one of these would probably be her name...whoa. we thought about it though and decided that it was just too early to make a final decision so we put it on the backburner and focused on cribs, stollers, nursery room colors and the like. in the meantime, we kept up our nightly prayers and kept asking for the holy spirit to help us know which name to choose.

about week 34 or so, we started thinking about middle names. for this one we had fewer ideas but were more focused. at bedtime every night, cheryl and i pray a hail mary and ask for love and support from the virgin mary. so how about mary or maria or marie? then one day, cheryl suggested helen. now there is definitely a story behind this name...

growing up in houston, tom and helen linbeck were like two more members of my family. technically, they were just my little sister colleen's godparents but all four of us considered them surrogate godparents for sure. in august 2008, helen was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. on november 5, 2008, helen passed away and left us forever. in person at least. we know that her spirit is still around though and the love, kindness, joy, love, generosity, wisdom and...love that she shared with so many still is alive and strong in those she touched. what better way to pass those values along to our children than honor helen by naming our baby after her. so it was settled. days later we knew that annabel would be her first name and the decision was made.
















once we knew that she would forever be known as annabel helen, i decided we really needed to know what this name meant. somewhere in the years 20-50 BC, saint anne was born to an unassuming couple who the story says had been barren for over 20 years. their little girl anne grew up, married a dude named joachim and bore a child named mary. this mary was chosen by god and gave birth in a dirty manger to jesus christ, the savior of the world. the name anne means grace. saint helena was born in the mid-third century into a family of little means. she eventually married emperor constantius and was the mother of constantine the great. through his conversion, constantine changed the face of christianity forever. the name helena means light. we love our annabel helen and what better way could we prepare her to change the world with her love but by naming her the daughter of grace and light...

so that is the story. if you have a story about your baby's name we would love to hear it. email us at aggierobison@gmail.com.

first doctor's appointment...

so we took our babe to the doctor for her very first appointment with the pediatrician. she got an A+. hooray annabel!















her sixth day out of the womb, she is almost back up to her birth weight (started at 7lb 4oz, fell to 6 lb 14 oz and weighed in today at 7 lb 2 oz today). she lost an inch in heighth though which doesn't make any sense to me. i didn't figure girls started shrinking until they turned like 75 years old :) dr. g was a neat lady and we are glad that we got to meet with her. her office is a group of seven pediatricians: six women and one dude. we'll stick with dr. g for our well visits and see whichever doctor is available when we have to take her in for a sick appointment. she was very positive about how well annabel is transitioning and gave some great suggestions and welcome recommendations. bottom line: we like our pediatrician and our baby is doing well!

guess what today is...

...it's GOING HOME DAY!















the doctor has been telling us for a few days that they would probably want to keep annabel until monday or tuesday but then this morning he came in and said, "well, we've been thinking and talking and how would you like to take her home today?" OH MY GOSH!

needless to say this is kind of a shocker and now its time to starting really freaking out...but we're still thrilled that she gets to come home with us today. it means that she has shown some real improvements in the past 48 hours that the doctor and nurses are confident sending her home. that is awesome! please continue to pray for annabel and cheryl that they will both continue to improve from the delivery and work out some of the lingering feeding kinks. and that all of us will be able to adjust to life at home with a baby and still work in lots of rest and relaxing whenever we can.

ALSO - click here for some photos that the hospital staff photograher took of baby annabel yesterday. cheryl got to dress her in her first cute outfit...

she opened her eyes!

this baby is amazing! each day she does something else to make us fall even more in love with her! who would have thought that opening her eyes would be so cool...but man, it is! :)
























you may notice that her left eye looks funny. she's got some little infection or irritation but the nurse is watching it and it shouldn't last too long...

we also have a video. if you don't think this is as cool as we do, i'm not surprised...cause we think it is REALLY COOL!



or click here to view on youtube

annabel and the g-pa...

grandpa bob got to spend less than 24 hours here but probably about 20 of those hours he had a baby in his arms (maybe a slight exaggeration). we think that he's really taking a liking to this grandpa thing...


or click here to view on youtube

day three update

so annabel is still in the special care unit... :( but she is taking baby steps to get outta there and back to us on the "normal" wing of the postpartum unit. wednesday night she got rid of all the crud in her system that was messing up her breathing and o2 saturation levels. that was a major accomplishment. the nurses said that its a good thing when a baby does that on her own. the only thing now keeping her from moving down the hall is the fact that she is not yet eating (enough) on her own and so has to remain on an IV and a feeding tube (in her nose - yuck). we're now coming down to attempt to feed her every 3 hours on the dot. the first 15 minutes cheryl nurses her and then we try 15 minutes with a bottle. she is slowly getting used to us sticking stuff in her mouth and telling her to eat so we're hopeful she will give in soon and act like a hungry, hungry hippo. the last two feedings she's finished her bottle. yay annabel!

its tough thinking about her having to stay in the hospital any longer than necessary just because she won't eat. we know its because she had such a traumatic time in the beginning and its not because she has some long-term problem, but its still tough. however, as the nurse told me when i sleepily stumbled out of the room with cheryl at 3:00 in the morning to go feed annabel, "this too shall pass".

more photos are online (click here or the picture below). she is such a cutie!

first video of annabel...

live from the hospital, here's annabel...



or click here to view on youtube

cutest dang baby in the world...

annabel and cheryl are doing much better now than they were at the beginning of the day. the trauma of the birth took its toll on both ladies but they are improving by the hour. cheryl was able to get out of bed twice already and even got to wheel around the floor in a chair. annabel is off of oxygen, regulating her o2 and co2 levels and on her way to life as a happy, healthy baby in the normal part of the postpartum wing.

we've got new photos online. click here or the photo to view them (pages 2-3 of the facebook album). thank you so much for all the prayers. no telling where we would be if the holy spirit had not been with us this morning.

st. ann, pray for us...

she has arrived!!!

so i believe that the best things in life are never easy. and bringing our baby into the world was no exception. this morning at 5:29am EST, annabel helen robison was born! if her birth was any indication of future things, she will be quite the instigator of drama for the rest of her life.

i woke up at 330am to cheryl telling me that she thought that this labor thing was starting. her contractions were pretty gentle at that point but were getting closer together. i started moving around the house gathering our stuff, loading the car and preparing for a few days in the hospital. at 430am the contractions were pretty significant and about 3-5 minutes apart. we called the doctor and she suggested we make our way to the hospital. we arrived around 500am and the nurse checked us in and started her exam. everything was fine until she started using the fetal heart rate monitor and couldnt find the baby's heartbeat...never in my life have i felt such complete dread. she called in a few more nurses and one was finally able to find the heartbeat, but it was low (about 60 bpm when its supposed to be over 130). they immediately mobilized and began prepping cheryl for surgery. she was whisked away with her entourage of doctors and nurses and i was left standing there wondering what the heck was going happen. a nice nurse then led me down the hall to the postpartum room. during this time about three nurses asked me if i was okay, to which i had to honestly reply no. this was awful.

this story does have a wonderful ending though. about 20 minutes after i got the room, the nurses wheeled in the most beautiful baby that i have ever seen. she was perfect. her transition after birth and the trauma in the womb have her struggling a little bit to adjust and she'll be spending the day in the special care unit where they can keep her on oxygen and monitor her a little more closely. cheryl, meanwhile, is resting and recovering in her room from the whole ordeal.

so you may ask what caused all this commotion. cheryl had a 30% placental abruption. this is where the placenta begins to tear away from the uterine wall before it should. once it does this it stops functioning in a life-giving capacity and is simply tissue in the womb - not good for baby or mom. this is why annabel was having such a hard time breathing and is still now processing through the extra acid and crud in her lungs and system. theres no telling how quickly this tearing process was occurring but the doctor told me that if we had arrived just 30 minutes later, it would probably have been a much different visit.

thank god for all the blessings that we dont even know happened. most of all we thank him for our healthy baby and mom. st. ann, pray for us...

harvey and the popcorn

i don't think that we're ready to take him on the road but that doesn't mean its not fun to watch...:)



or click here to view on youtube

some new photos at nine months...

who knew that pregnancy came with a tabletop?























in the front yard